eternal love

the world lost a really great person last saturday.  over the years i have posted a lot about the love that i have for paul walker (you can read those posts here if you want).  i have just always been so attracted to him because, i mean, look at him.  he's perfection.  but it wasn't only about his incredible good looks. he has just always seemed like such a nice, down to earth, humble guy and i really admire that about him.  he was beautiful inside and out.

i might (/definitely do) have a couple pictures of paul at my desk at work so most of my co-workers know about my love for him. the monday before thanksgiving (5 days before he passed away) my co-worker had people around the office write down what they were thankful for and then she took a picture of us with it and posted it on the ultradent blog.  if you can find me in there you will see that i said i was thankful for paul walker, which i genuinely am. well today they made a card with a photoshopped picture of paul and me and then had everyone sign it.  see picture below.

when they gave it to me, i just thought "this is awesome, we look so good together! i knew it!"  i didn't realize it was a card so when they told me to open it and i saw that all my co-workers had signed it, i started to sob.  like crying so hard with tears running down my face in front of my co-workers. i could still cry right now thinking about it.  but isn't that just the nicest and funniest thing ever?  it just melted my heart.

i know it's silly that i have this crush and that he means so much to me but i have had countless people tell me how sorry they are for my loss.  i know that it is partially to joke with me but i still really have felt loved nonetheless.  i just feel really lucky to have so many friends and people that care about me. so thank you for your condolences, they mean a lot to me. it takes away a little bit of the sting of losing the love of my life.  

well paul, as much as i don't want to believe it, i guess this is goodbye for now. just know that you will always have my heart and i will love you forever.

love always,

paige

emotionally attached.

we've been together for nearly 18 months.  and 17 of those months have been well, quite wonderful.

i'm in love with my car.  isn't she pretty?

i mean, i even wrote a happy anniversary post to it.  to my car.  if that isn't true love, i don't know what is.

but you see, my love unfortunately isn't blind and i can see her faults.  like the fact that she is at 89,100 miles.  like her price tag when it comes to well, everything.  like that time i opted not to pay $1,500 to fix her water pump (those aren't important, right?) and then she got mad at me and overheated in the mountains 9 months later.  real mature.  that $4,000 (yes, three zeros) repair bill was super fun.  i totally didn't need all that money it took me all those months to save.  but you know, i suppose i kind of brought that one on myself.  note to self - fix things in red on the summary sheet at the car shop.

on that note, i have to get her rear brakes and tires done.  if i do that at bmw (which i'm not going to) it will be over $1,000 for both.  if i go somewhere else, like $400 for the brakes and i have no idea what tires cost, so maybe like $800 total.  when they told me this a few weeks ago i decided it was time to trade her in for a new car.

so i've been looking at other baby suvs.  i haven't test driven that many but every time that i have gotten back into my car at the dealership i just think "man i love my car."  i don't need all these fancy new technology things, except bluetooth.  i can't hold my phone up to my ear anymore.  you just can't come back from that.  i just want my car.  i love the giant sunroof, the perfect thickness of the steering wheel for my hands, the bluetooth, the heated steering wheel, the instant heated seats, the fake wood whatever stuff on the interior, how speedy and good at accelerating she is.  but with at least 40,000 miles less.  and with brand new brakes and tires that i didn't have to pay for.  is this too much to ask?

so pretty much, i have an emotional attachment to my car.  maybe that makes me ridiculous, but this is just where i'm at right now.

five

fast five was on tv last night.

as i sat there and watched the last 20 minutes i thought to myself, "man, i wish the sixth fast and furious movie was out so that paul walker and i could spend my birthday together like we did last year."

because i don't know if you know this, but my 25th birthday is in five days.

FIVE DAYS, PEOPLE!

don't worry, there's still time to get me a present.  i even made a board on pinterest to help you in your search, you can view it here. if it isn't obvious, i'd really like a pair of j.crew shorts.  i'd also like to add a costco/giant size bag of riesens to that list.  every year i hope that someone will get this for me and no one ever does. so this year i am just going to ask for it.

i'm going to be 25 in five days.

it's time for another paul walker post.

so i'm in the middle of a fast and furious marathon (don't judge).

seriously paul walker, can you please stop being so incredibly attractive? and can you please tell your eyes to stop piercing into my soul? and can you please stop having just the right amount of scruff? it isn't good for my heart.

well paul, if you can't stop any of the above, can you please never stop making these fast and furious movies? i'd really appreciate it.

sending you huge amounts of love right now,

paige

you can read more about my obsession with paul walker here, here, here, and here.

p.s. (paige + stacy)

look at these cuties

so young and innocent.

completely unaware of what the future held for them.

back when i was a freshman in college at byu and apparently wore my hair in a pompadour everyday, i lived in helaman halls. i had a roommate named stacy jean bingham. we didn't know each other beforehand but we became friends, the greatest of friends. we did everything together and people started to think of us as one person because we pretty much were. halfway through our sophomore year stacy decided to transfer home to the university of arkansas so we haven't gotten to see each other very much over the past 5 years.

our friend mickelle got married in salt lake last month and stacy came up for the wedding so we got to have a little reunion. we hadn't seen each other in three years and it was really great to get to spend some time together.

i miss her.

is it just me or have we kind of become women...? awkward.

heaven sent

i never won anything in my life until i started working at opal orthodontics and now i just can't stop. my most recent win is a picture frame from our product focus meeting today.
i am surprised by the amount of people that don't know who paul walker is and have asked me if he is my boyfriend. "yeah, i just keep a topless photo of my boyfriend by my desk and he just happens to be the most attractive man to have ever walked on this planet." no big deal.

in other news, martha found a website to see what your babies will look like with other people. she experimented with the love of her life (her fiance seth) and i did with mine. i think he's kind of creepily pretty but cute. maybe this is a sign...

my baby with jake gyllenhaal... not so much.
baaaaaah!!! terrifying.

oh paulie.

so you may have heard about fast five. i have no idea why they keep making these movies but i'm okay with it. i've said it before and i'll say it again. most attractive man to have ever walked this planet.

i mean how could you resist this?

baaaaaah. love.

i am seriously going to the midnight showing of this. who's in?

i'll go by myself if i have to.

it finally happened

jim and pam are married. i am still a little bitter that it was pam and not me, but i guess it just wasn't in the cards.

what did you think of the episode? i thought the boat deal was really precious and romantic. other than that though, it kind of let me down. this whole season of the office is letting me down, much like the last half of season 5 did. i honestly don't think i laughed more than once the whole hour, if that. jim was really sweet, but i wish they would have showed a little more about pam loving jim and not just him having been in love with her forever.

how cute is this photo shoot from entertainment weekly? they look so beautiful. i want to do a picture like the one on the left when i get married. so precious.

let's talk about paul walker.

remember when you saw she's all that when you were 12 and you were like "who is this hot jerk? i think i love him" and then you saw pleasantville and loved him as a precious square. then you saw the skulls and you were hooked. you could no longer resist him and kind of loved the fast and the furious. and now if you come across anything with him in it, you have to watch it. and maybe your name is lori fackrell and you have a framed picture of him next to your bed. maybe. (sorry aunt lori, your secret is out...)

it doesn't matter that he isn't the greatest actor ever. but what does matter is that he is incredibly good looking - that doesn't even do him justice, he's is one of (if not the most) beautiful men to have ever lived on this planet. that sounds about right. and i don't even like guys with blonde hair. from his strong jaw line and soul-piercing eyes to his chiseled abs...okay let's just have a moment of silence for and look at all these glorious pictures of the paul walker.

oh paulie. i'll reactivate you (that's right, he was raised LDS) and have beautiful babies with you, if you insist.

unconditional love.

ladies and gentlemen, i have found mutual love. 

i have found something i love with all my heart and that something loves me right back.  i was introduced to this special something a few years ago, and my life has never been the same since. one could say that it literally changed my life.

i know you are dying to know, what is it that has paige so smitten?  oh, it's just the greatest thing to ever happen to her.  

dove unconditional chocolate ice cream.  the name does not disappoint.  it is always there when you need it and is always so incredibly satisfying.  it has a layer of ganache that you break through to get to the ice cream.  the ice cream itself is chocolate and has chocolate chunks and chocolate swirls in it.  if that doesn't sound like perfection, i don't know what does.

utah is a little behind on things (and when i say "things" i mean pretty much everything amazing) and didn't get this little piece of heaven until almost a year ago.  in colorado this puppy is not hard to find, just hop on over to your local safeway and you're good to go.  this has not been the case in utah.  unconditional chocolate had a short stint at the 7-11 on university ave. and 500 north in the winter of 2006 and disappeared much too soon.  albertson's also thought it would be a good idea to carry dove ice cream, but in every flavor except unconditional chocolate.  such a travesty.  

one night last spring i was on an ice cream run with my roommates at smith's and there it was.  i could not believe my eyes.  i started hyperventilating and proceeded to purchase this little piece of divinity.  on occasion the smith's in provo is out of it and i have to drive all the way up to orem to get it.  have you ever been to the smith's in orem?  around midnight?  slightly terrifying.  i am so passionate about this ice cream, i called ahead to the orem store to make sure they had it and asked if i could put it on hold when i was on my way up there.  sounds a little crazy now doesn't it?

go to smith's, buy it (on sale for $1.99 right now - don't worry i bought 3), and let the life changing begin.  you can thank me later.

honestly, how could you resist?

dear john krasinski,

remember how on sunday night's special episode of the office jim was all precious and broke up pam's parents' marriage because he loves pam so much?   remember how you and jim halpert are pretty much the same person?  please tell me you are.  remember how i'm in love with you?

love, 

paige 

the type.

people are always talking about what their type is. i wonder what exactly is my type and how i could explain it to someone. I can sum up my type in two words: jim halpert. if you don't know who jim halpert is (because you live under a rock), he is the character on the office that is played by john krasinski. so why this jim halpert character? this man is perfection. he is a precious square, meaning that he always does the right thing. he is hilarious, he is always playing these little jokes on dwight and they get me every time. he is not drop dead gorgeous by any means, but he is just so effing cute. the way he smirks at the camera makes me melt. about a year ago in the one spot at target, they had office supplies from the office and i of course went crazy and spent about $20 on 20 $1 items, and there were these i heart jim sticky notes, notepads and mousepads. it was literally one of the greatest moments of my life. i am not kidding, you can ask all of the people i called the moment i saw them. anyway, he is so completely in love with pam beasley, soon to be pam halpert (shoot me in the face). he is sweet, genuine, sincere, romantic, thoughtful, and wonderful. his proposal to pam was probably one of the most precious proposals i have ever seen. and to top it all off, he is just a normal guy, but i have yet to meet anyone like him. i love this man. but, he does have one enormous flaw...he is a fictional character, living in a fictional world that i cannot live in. of all the luck. so, just in case you were wondering, jim halpert is paige's type.