Monday, December 2, 2013

eternal love

the world lost a really great person last saturday.  over the years i have posted a lot about the love that i have for paul walker (you can read those posts here if you want).  i have just always been so attracted to him because, i mean, look at him.  he's perfection.  but it wasn't only about his incredible good looks. he has just always seemed like such a nice, down to earth, humble guy and i really admire that about him.  he was beautiful inside and out.

i might (/definitely do) have a couple pictures of paul at my desk at work so most of my co-workers know about my love for him. the monday before thanksgiving (5 days before he passed away) my co-worker had people around the office write down what they were thankful for and then she took a picture of us with it and posted it on the ultradent blog.  if you can find me in there you will see that i said i was thankful for paul walker, which i genuinely am. well today they made a card with a photoshopped picture of paul and me and then had everyone sign it.  see picture below.
when they gave it to me, i just thought "this is awesome, we look so good together! i knew it!"  i didn't realize it was a card so when they told me to open it and i saw that all my co-workers had signed it, i started to sob.  like crying so hard with tears running down my face in front of my co-workers. i could still cry right now thinking about it.  but isn't that just the nicest and funniest thing ever?  it just melted my heart.

i know it's silly that i have this crush and that he means so much to me but i have had countless people tell me how sorry they are for my loss.  i know that it is partially to joke with me but i still really have felt loved nonetheless.  i just feel really lucky to have so many friends and people that care about me. so thank you for your condolences, they mean a lot to me. it takes away a little bit of the sting of losing the love of my life.  
well paul, as much as i don't want to believe it, i guess this is goodbye for now. just know that you will always have my heart and i will love you forever.

love always,

No comments: